In this issue, “I'm sorry Sir you can't start there. It's the rules you see. Section Q of the Beginning of Literary Products Act 1932 says ‘that no scribe or other penman shall begin his written submission with insufficient introductory remarks’. (Defined as ‘Text’, Sir, in the colloquial speech of those intended as subscribers.) For a list of permitted languages, creoles or pidgins, see Room 2794 of Great Universal Government Towers, Miss Hill, Thursdays, AM only.”
“Will this do, then?“
“Not for me to say, Sir.”
Well I'm going to start. Blow your whistle, constabule.
For the purposes of beginning this column, the following shall be regarded as so authorised — Geoff.
In this issue, rogue clock winders, climbing tree stumps, the Black Hand Gang, conifers away!, some acid remarks…
